


The Meaning of Flowers

by rosesiris2020



Category: Bandom, Paramore
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-02
Updated: 2020-09-05
Packaged: 2021-03-06 18:07:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 11,410
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26243134
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rosesiris2020/pseuds/rosesiris2020
Summary: "Love is the flower you've got to let grow" - JLHayley and Taylor's life, told through the flowers and the meaning they share.
Relationships: Hayley Williams/Taylor York
Comments: 7
Kudos: 29





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hello there! This is just a random idea I had as I was scrolling through Hayley's Instagram which is filled with her love of flowers and plants!
> 
> I'm going to update Sudden Desire soon, I just needed to get this idea out first so I can focus on that properly.
> 
> I hope you enjoy it!

2010

Hayley wrapped her arms tight around her body after she locked the car, bracing against the cold wind as she trudged up the driveway. Nashville in November could be brutal when the cold set in.

Her gloved hands knocked on the door quickly as she shifted from side to side, trying to keep warm in the wind.

“Come on, come on, come on,” she urged as she knocked again, desperate to get inside. She considered herself to be pretty tough but the cold really did suck.

She smiled in relief as she heard the sound of footsteps approach the other side of the door, stepping closer to the door to be ready to barge in as soon as it opened.

“Hey there,” Taylor greeted her as he pulled open the door, smiling as he took in her red nose and cheeks as she danced from side to side to keep warm in her winter coat. “You want to come in or something?” he laughed as he stepped further into the doorway, leaning against the frame and effectively blocking her path into the house.

“Taylor!” Hayley whined as he stood smugly in the doorway, his head tilted in mock confusion. “Let me into your house, it’s freezing out here.”

“Oh, this house?” he says, pointing over his shoulder. “Why? Are you cold or something?” he said, grinning at her growing exasperation.

“Ugh, you’re so annoying,” she laughed as he stood to his full height, using his body to block her attempts to get in. He was significantly taller than her and she knew realistically she had no chance against him if he really wanted to stop her coming in, but the cold was biting and she had no qualms against shoulder barging him into his own house to get some warmth.

“Woah,” he cried as she wrapped her arms around his waist and pushed with all her might. They both laughed as she drove him backwards into the hallway, growling in exertion.

Hayley eventually stopped pushing once she was firmly in his hallway and just laughed against his checked shirt. She felt goofy and light, just like when they were kids. They hadn’t be all that close in recent years and she was glad they we growing back together.

“You good now, John Cena?” Taylor laughed as he used his hands on her shoulders to look at her. The beanie she had been wearing had dislodged against his chest, so he reached up to pull it gently back into place.

Hayley grinned up at him whilst he did so, processing the strange sensation of adrenaline coursing through her body from their playing as he sweetly doted on her.

“Listen, girls got to do what she’s got to do,” she explained shamelessly as Taylor went to shut the door and stop the cold air from flowing in. She grinned as he laughed at her words, enjoying the validation it gave her to hear the sound.

“So where are we doing this?” she asked as she looked around, waiting for direction.

Taylor pointed over her shoulder in the direction of the living room. “I’ve got my guitar and mic set up in there,” he explained simply as stuffing his hands in his jean pockets. “Or we can try it wherever you think is best,” he offered quickly, cheeks flushing red.

“That sounds great!” Hayley offered gently. She knew he was still struggling to really assert himself into his new role in the band and it was clear that he was uncomfortable with shaking up her writing process so he could fit into it. It was still a slow process for them, but they were getting there and slowly learning how best to work alone together. She couldn’t be more grateful for him stepping up like this.

“Okay then,” Taylor smiled, pleased at her response. “You can go and set up on the sofa if you want, I’m just going to grab something from the kitchen.”

Hayley flashed a thumbs up to him as she kicked off her shoes and draped her coat and scarf over the rack before padding over to the sofa. She stopped and smiled at the framed photo on the side table of Taylor and his brothers, hair curly and wild, clearly taken a few years ago.

“Hey, do you want anything from the kitchen?” Taylor called from the other room, breaking her attention from the photo frame.

“No, I’m good thanks,” she called back, placing the frame back before dropping her bag on the fall in front of the coffee table that held Taylor’s laptop and a small microphone. She smiled at the simple writing set up. Taylor was much more interested in writing than he had let on when he first joined the band and the basic equipment proved it. Her heart twinged slightly at the effort he was making for the band to keep going, the way he was clearly pushing himself out of his comfort zone just to help out.

“Erm hey,” Taylor coughed awkwardly as he appeared at the side of the couch, his teasing demeanour from early had completely disappeared. Hayley frowned slightly at the bouquet of daisies that sat awkwardly in his hands, before looking back up to him for an explanation.

“So, erm,” Taylor cleared his throat self-consciously, “these are for you.”

Hayley blinked at him.

“Don’t worry, this isn’t me trying to be weird or anything,” he rushed out to reassure her, gesturing between the two of them. Hayley blinked in confusion at what he could be implying. “I just got you these,” he said, pushing the flowers out in front of her. He cringed at his own confusing explanation.

Hayley wordlessly accepted them, unsure what to say as she glanced down at them. She would have assumed they were hand-picked if it wasn’t for the white ribbon holding them together. Taylor was not the sort of guy to have spare ribbons hiding around his house. “Taylor, they are beautiful,” she eventually stammered out, “I just don’t know why you are giving them to me?”

Taylor rubbed his brow, frowning to himself. “Yeah, I don’t really know why I am either,” he laughed painfully, ears flushing a deep red as he regretted his choice.

Hayley winced as she watched him grimace to himself. “No, they really are beautiful, T,” she reassured him, reaching out with her free hand to pull him to the sofa, “I just want to know what they are for.”

Hayley could feel the embarrassment radiating off him as he settled awkwardly next to her. She smiled encouragingly at him as her thumb rubbed against the wrist that she was still holding.

“I don’t know, it was stupid,” he rushed out immediately, before pausing and composing himself. He turned and forced himself to look directly at her, feeling a small wash of relief as she greeted him with that warm smile. “I guess I just wanted to give you them to say thanks,” he said in a small voice.

Hayley looked at him questioningly, confused by his response. “Thanks for what?” she laughed gently, trying to understand him.

Taylor hesitated again before swallowing. “I just wanted to say thanks for giving me a shot at all this,” he said, gesturing to the set up in front of them. “I know you’re used to writing with Josh and you two were a great team, but I really liked making that new song with you and I think it’s really good, so I guess I just wanted to say thanks for letting me be part of that.”

Hayley’s heart softened as she watched him stumble through his explanation. Taylor had always been sweet and sensitive to her, even during their early teens when she’d desperately pined for Josh during band rehearsals when he had clearly no interest in his little brother's friend. She smiled broadly at the same boy who bought her flowers just to apologise for not being her old songwriting partner.

“Taylor,” she laughed sweetly, “You didn’t need to get me flowers,” she said, still overwhelmed by it all.

“Yeah, well,” he grimaced awkwardly, rubbing the back of his neck.

“No, I love them,” she assured him, “but I feel like I should have got you something, not the other way round.”

Taylor looked at her, confusion evident and she laughed again, even more endeared to him. “I should be thanking you,” she stressed, placing her hand on his shoulder. “I love the new song,” she assured him again, “and God knows where we’d be without you stepping up,” she stressed, pushing doing the hurt that brewed as she remembered what state the band had been in. “This is the new Paramore,” she said, gesturing me between them, “Me, you and Jeremy,” she said firmly, “I wouldn’t want it any other way.”

Taylor nodded at her words, and she could feel his shoulder start to relax under her hand.

“Listen,” she continued, “our process isn’t perfect yet and I wouldn’t expect it to be like it was before. But we are going to get this right over time and eventually we are going to put out a kickass new album that we are really proud of,” she said, adjusting her grip on his shoulder as she smiled at him with her brows raised, waiting for him to respond.

Taylor eventually cracked a smile and nodded.

“We are going to do this,” she reassured him, “together.”

Taylor nodded again, more confident this time and wiped his sweaty palms on his jeans. “Yeah you’re right,” he confirmed, almost more for himself than her, “we can just take this step by step.”

Hayley grinned brightly at his affirmation and squeezed his shoulder once more before standing up. “I’m going to put these in some water,” she said, pointing at the kitchen doorway, “and then let’s get to writing!”

Taylor laughed snorted at her final cheer and watched her as she left, before shaking his head softly and reaching for his guitar.

2012

“Hey,” Taylor called gently from the doorway.

“Hey you,” Hayley turned and smiled, please to see her friend.

“So I got you something,” Taylor teased, raising his brows with pride.

“Did you now?” she laughed as he beamed under her attention.

Taylor took a swig of his beer and nodded. “Don’t worry, it’s not a beer,” he confirmed as he swallowed.

The hum of music and people celebrating downstairs rang out into her bedroom where she sat on her bed. They had finally finished mixing the album after what felt like years of work on it and the team and their friends had gathered at Hayley’s house to celebrate.

Hayley pursed her lips as she waited for him to reveal the mystery present, snorting as he swayed slightly to the doorframe, using it to hold himself steady.

“I’m actually not drunk,” he promised, voice raising in pitch defensively.

“I’m sure you not,” she consoled him, laughing as he nodded and completely missed her sarcasm.

“I’m not!” he assured, “I just excited and I didn’t want to give you this in front of everyone.”

Hayley’s brows raised in surprised and confusion. The only people downstairs were their team and friends.

Taylor grinned and walked towards her carefully before pulling his hidden hand from behind his back.

“Ta da!” he announced, holding out a bouquet of flowers out in front of her.

Hayley breathe caught in her throat as she looked at the flowers that she recognised as hollyhocks and tilted her head in affection to look up at Taylor. He grinned proudly at her as he nodded for her to take them.

“T, you shouldn’t have!” she cried as she accepted them, pausing to smell them.

He shrugged bashfully, his shyness overpowering his tipsy pride as he reacted to her appreciation. “It’s no big deal,” he said, still grinning softly. “Sorry if they are a bit crooked, I left them in the car for most of the night.”

“They’re beautiful T,” she said sincerely as she walked to the en-suite to fill a vase with water. “Why didn’t you give them to me earlier?” she called out, as she waited for the water to fill the glass.

“I don’t know,” he said bashfully, waving off her confusion. “I guess I didn’t want Chad to think I was being too forward or something.”

Hayley’s cheeks reddened as he spoke, unsure of what the twist in her gut at his words meant. They had been friends since they were thirteen but there had never been the suggestion that people in their life could see them as anything else. Processing that someone could think it was a possibility was something her brain wasn’t willing to handle right now. She focused on arranging the flowers to give her face time to cool before walking back into the bedroom to face Taylor.

“Man, I feel bad that I don’t have something you right now,” she said, changing up the conversation as she re-entered the room to place the vase on her bedside table. “I promise I have something but I was going to give it to you with the rest of the guys.”

Taylor waved her off again. “Don’t worry about it,” he said, “these were more just to say thank you then as your wrap present.”

“Thank you?” Hayley said, “For what?”

“I don’t know,” Taylor shrugged again, voice raising in pitch in embarrassment, “I just wanted to say thanks for trusting me to be part of this team and that I’m really glad we did this together.”

Hayley’s face softened as she watched him stumble through his words. “Taylor,” she said, getting his attention, “we are a team. You and me. I didn’t ‘trust you to be a part of it’, we made this together.”

Taylor nodded as he took in her words, shoulders still hunching forward anyway. “I know,” he said quietly, swapping the bottle between his hands, “I just know that some of the writing took longer than it used to with Josh but I’m glad we made it through it.”

“Taylor,” Hayley cried, laughing in exasperation as she rounded the bed to grab his shoulders. “What we’ve made is awesome, and it doesn’t matter how long it took us. We had to start from scratch after Josh practically abandoned us so what we’ve achieved is nothing short of amazing.”

Taylor nodded and smiled softly at her words. “And to top it all off,” she continued, shaking his shoulders, “I’m so glad I did this with you and not Josh. I don’t want to make music with him, or anyone else for that matter,” she pointed out. “This is my dream writing team,” she said, pointing between them, “and I’m just as grateful to be a part of it.”

Taylor smiled broadly at her words and nodded, pausing for a moment before looking up and pushing his shoulders back. “Well we did it,” he said simply, smile widening, “we really made an album.”

“Hell yeah we did,” Hayley said laughing, stepping closer and opening her arms to wrap them around him.

They held onto each other for several moments, with only the sound of the party downstairs echoing through the room.

Hayley took great comfort being in his arms and sighed in relief at the realisation that they had really pulled it off. Two years ago she had been convinced the band was over, but Taylor came through for her and saved it all and she couldn’t be more grateful for him. It had been hard and difficult to begin with, and there were days where she genuinely felt like it was never going to work. But together they’d managed it.

Hayley counted to three before finally pulling away and out of her contented haze, tilting her head back to look at Taylor. “You ready to go back downstairs?” she asked quietly. She would never admit it but she was shocked by her own reluctance.

Taylor cleared his throat and nodded as he broke himself out of a daze, opening his mouth before shutting it again, stopping himself from saying what he really felt. He stepped back from her and gesture to the door. “After you,” he said teasingly, grinning at his own attempt at chivalry.

Hayley rolled her eyes and laughed before deciding to play along. “Thank you, good sir,” she said, bowing to him before heading to the doorway.

She glanced once more at the flowers sat on her table and felt a rush of emotions she couldn’t quite put her finger on. The band hadn’t felt this stable in a long time and she hadn’t realised until that moment what a relief it was to know they could get through anything together. This was a brand new era for the three of them and she’d never felt stronger. They were going to prove to everyone that this stage of Paramore was unbeatable, and she couldn’t wait.

She turned and grinned back at Taylor as she approached the top of the stairs, stopping suddenly as she needed to look at him again and confirm that this was really their reality now.

Taylor raised his brows as he took another swig of the beer that had gotten slightly warm during his nervous tossing of it. “You good, H?” he said amused, slightly confused by her sudden stop to grin at him.

She laughed softly and realised what she’d done. She shook her head at herself before nodding to him, “Yeah, I really am,” she said softly, before moving to join the party again.

2015

Nashville was shockingly warm for the season. Taylor noticed it as he climbed out of the car, but he didn’t quite feel it.

His mind was blank as he walked up the path, too exhausted to plan what he wanted to say. He wouldn’t admit it if someone asked but he was itching for another cigarette. He’d smoked two on the drive over to calm his nerves but that had only been temporary.

He adjusted the pot in his hands to rest on his hip as he knocked on the door, sighing heavily as he waited. The conversation was going to be heavy, regardless of what he said or did to try and make it better, and he quite frankly was lacking the energy to face whatever emotions it dragged up.

The sound of the locks sliding open snapped his mind back into focus and he pushed his shoulders back to create some illusion that he was for her that he was doing okay.

Taylor couldn’t help the soft smile that grew at the sight of Hayley peeking through the door. The dark circles under her eyes were a painful contrast to her pale skin and her hair sat in a lank bun on her head. Objectively, she was looking worse than he’d seen her in look in months. But she still brought a smile to his face.

“Hey.”

“Hi,” Hayley mumbled quietly, opening the door wider to silently invite him in.

Taylor nodded and stepped through the door, heading straight for the sofa. He winced at the uncomfortable silence and regretted not planning something to say to her. They’d been a solid team for years now but he couldn’t figure out what to say to his partner.

He dropped onto the edge of the sofa and span the pot that was still in his hands as he stared at the edge of the rug. He waited for the dip in the sofa cushion next to him before he turned to finally look at Hayley.

He cleared his throat awkwardly before thrusting the pot towards her. Hayley remained motionless for another long, long moment before finally letting out a sigh and untucking her hands from inside the blanket she had wrapped around herself to accept the gift.

“They are violets, I think,” Taylor mumbled awkwardly as he gestured to the small purple flowers. “My mom said they would be right, like the meaning or something,” he said, trying to prompt Hayley to say something. He sighed and grimaced at the continuing silence, “I think you can keep them outside as well,” he said, slowly drifting off as he ran out of facts to give her.

Hayley turned to look at him finally, staring at him with a look in her eye that he couldn’t quite place. She pulled the pot into her lap and looked at them sadly before swallowing.

Taylor waited as she sighed and rubbed a harsh hand across her eyes. He wasn’t going to push her to talk if she didn’t want to but he wasn’t going to force himself to either.

Hayley moved a stay hair behind her ear before adjusting the blanket around her shoulders.

“I’m sorry T,” she said.

“You don’t have anything to be sorry for,” Taylor told her simply.

“Yes, I do,” she insisted again.

Taylor could tell the argument was pointless, and they didn’t need to be fighting each other as well right now. He knew it wasn’t Hayley’s fault but it didn’t seem like anyone else was going to think that. He usually loved being a relatively lesser-known member of the band but all he felt right now was guilt for not being able to help shoulder the burden that was placed on Hayley.

They sat in silence again until Hayley finally spoke again.

“I can’t believe he actually did it,” she mumbled, voice laced with disbelief. “He really wants to fucking sue us.”

Taylor’s mouth opened and shut as he tried to think of anything to say. Eventually, he just nodded and mumbled, “Yeah, he really does.”

“What did we even do to make him want to do that?” she spat, a hint of anger tinging her tired voice. “I thought we finally were a family.”

Taylor winced as her voice cracked.

“We are,” he insisted, “Even if Jeremy doesn’t want to be part of it.”

“A two-person rock band?” Hayley laughed darkly, “Sounds great.”

“Yeah, it kind of sucks,” he agreed, laughing along despite nothing being funny.

Hayley snapped her head to look at him, panic growing in her eyes. “So you want to leave now too?”

“What?” Taylor asked, confused about what she was talking about. He stared at her as he processed what he had said, cringing as he realised she missed the sarcasm in his joke. “No, no, no,” he rushed out, quickly turning to face her. “I meant that, yeah I guess it doesn’t sound great on paper,” he reasoned, reaching out to steady the pot she was anxiously spinning, “but I’m not going anywhere, Hayley.”

Hayley looked up and met his gaze as he focused on looking directly at her, willing her to see that he meant what he said. “You said it before Hayley. We are a team,” he said firmly, reaching out to grab her blanket-covered shoulder, “and I’m not going to bail on this team just because it sucks right now.”

Hayley raised her brows like she almost believed what he was saying. It hurt him to see that she still wasn’t couldn’t quite do it. She failed to give a response to his words and the silence formed something like anger form in his chest. It wasn’t directed at her. It was directed at Jeremy, at the media, at whoever had brought her to this point.

“I’m not going anywhere Hayley,” he said again.

He could see the moment it finally cracked inside of her. She swallowed heavily as she took in his words, bringing a hand to rest on her lips to mask the trembling. The sight of the diamond on her left hand struck a pang of sadness through him, but that wasn’t something he was going to dwell on right now.

“Hey,” Taylor said softly, as he reached to grab the pot of flowers and rested them on the coffee table. “Come here,” he said, opening his arms to her.

Hayley nodded quickly and snuffled in closer to bury her head against his shoulder. Taylor rested his arms around her small body, drawing soothing circles over her shoulders as he held her whilst she shook.

He was mad at Jeremy for filing the lawsuit. It felt like a betrayal after all the work they did together to make the band a family and it was shitty of him to make claims that they all knew weren’t true. But he couldn’t quite personally find the energy to be angry at him for leaving the band. It was a shock but it also wasn’t. The band’s history was filled with so much disruption and grief that he felt almost numb to the pain of a friend leaving you.

But the fury that swelled as Hayley cried in his arms wasn’t for him. It was for her. His relationship with Jeremy was different from the one he had with Hayley. She’d risked herself so many times for him and this was how he was leaving her. Taylor never considered himself to be a violent man but his fists clenched at the thought of what Jeremy was dragging her through.

They all knew that she was treated differently to the rest of the group. Hayley had taken most of the criticism after Josh and Zac left, regardless of their attempts to defend her and share their side of the story. Jeremy had witnessed that first hand and he knew what was inevitably going to happen when news of the lawsuit broke. She’d always been Jeremy’s closest friend and now he was willing to abandon them and throw her to the media dogs just for some royalties.

Taylor forced his jaw to relax before he got caught in a headspace he didn’t want to be in. He returned his attention to soothing Hayley as she hid her face in his neck.

They sat there in silence as Taylor held her through the tears, only the sound of Hayley’s occasional sniffles to fill the room. Taylor hadn’t planned on staying that long but he’d sit here all night if she needed him to.

“He’s really gone,” Hayley eventually croaked. “He’s really doing this to us.”

“Yeah,” Taylor replied simply, unsure how else to respond. “He really is.”

She pulled back from her position against his neck and looked him in the eyes. Taylor’s chest clenched at the redness in her face.

She nodded silently and wiped her eyes. “Ugh, I just know I look a mess,” she said to lighten the mood, pulling down the on the cuff on her hoodie to wipe her nose.

Taylor smiled and nodded. “Yeah,” he agreed teasingly, “you kind of do.”

Hayley cracked a smile for the first time since he’d arrived and smacked his shoulder, choking out a wet laugh as she fanned her face.

They sat in silence for a few more seconds as the light his joke brought faded. Hayley swallowed again and stared at him. Taylor wasn’t used to not knowing what she was thinking so he shifted under her gaze and reached for her hand.

“Listen,” he began softly, “I don’t know what going to happen with this case but I know it’s going to suck for you once it gets out,” he said, sighing in resignation. “But I promise you’ve got me, and we'll figure it out together.”

Hayley stared at him again and eventually nodded. She squeezed his hand in acknowledgement.

“Okay,” he said, chest growing lighter as he could see she was starting to believe him. “Let’s find somewhere to put these flowers then,” he said, gesturing to the abandoned violets on the table. “You’ve got to show me how to look after these though,” he said, standing up from the sofa to get them a change in scenery. He reached out his hand and wiggled his fingers, indicating to take it to help her up.

She huffed out in amusement and took his hand, abandoning the blanket to stay puddled on the sofa as she directed him towards the kitchen, plant in tow. She wiped her nose for one final time and pushed the stray hairs back behind her ears before smiling at him weakly.

“So now we are keeping plants alive together?” she joked as she reached for a glass to fill with water.

Taylor leaned against the kitchen cupboard as he watched her concentrate on giving the plant what it needed. He couldn’t really care less about gardening or flower requirements but he enjoyed watching her tongue sticking out as she focused on the small purple flowers. He smiled as she lifted the pot to smell them, grinning as she closed her eyes and hummed as her senses were flooded with the floral scent.

Taylor nodded as he watched her move about the kitchen, still hunched but more alive than she had been when he arrived.

“Yeah,” he agreed softly, “we are doing this together.”


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello! Sorry for the wait, it took me a while to figure out what to include in this one. I dunno if this is my best work but I hope you enjoy anyway!

The coffee shop was busy when Hayley walked in which was becoming an increasingly common recurrence. Sure, she was happy for the success that the small business was having but she couldn’t help but feel nostalgic for Nashville before the property boom. The streets felt packed and loud, like constant streams of people were rushing towards her and she had barely enough time to constantly dodge past.

After placing her order for tea from the teenage boy behind the counter, she squeezed between the tables of couples and friends to grab the last free table that sat in the corner. Sighing heavily as she dropped onto the seat, Hayley dug her fingers into the corners of her eyes as if that could downplay the ache of tiredness she'd been feeling for the last few weeks.

She took a sip of the tea and hummed as the cup warmed her hands. It wasn’t a particularly cold day for the city but she still felt grateful for some warmth.

Outside, a muffled emergency vehicle wailed down the street, drawing Hayley’s attention to the window. She stared until her eyes fuzzed out, the details of the street blurring. The noises of the busy coffee shop drowned out to a low hum in her ear.

She couldn't tell how long she’d been zoned out for when she jumped at the unexpected hand on her shoulder.

“Hey,” Taylor said hurriedly, as he dropped his jacket and bag onto the opposite chair. “I’m here but I’ve just got to order, you want anything?” he asked, as he pointed to where the teenager was waiting expectantly.

Hayley blinked as she snapped back into focus, processing his rushed words. “Um,” she said, looking down at her nearly entirely full cup of tea, “No, I’m good thanks.”

Taylor flashed her a thumbs up in acknowledgement and headed back over to the waiting boy. Hayley watched his back as he pointed to something on the board on the wall, before nodding and handing the kid some cash.

It had only been a few weeks since she'd last seen him but thickening in her throat at the sight of him still shocked her. She blinked and swallowed the lump away as she twisted the newer ring on her left hand. It did nothing to settle her except occupying her restless hands as she waited for him to settle at their table.

Hayley watched as he dropped the coffee onto the table before using the knife he was balancing a plate to cut the muffin he had bought. She smiled softly as he cut it in half and silent tipped it towards her.

“So how are you,” he asked as he swallowed a hot gulp of coffee.

Hayley shrugged and twisted the rings on her fingers again. “I’m good,” she said, mumbling to herself, before forcing herself to look him in the eye. “I’m good.”

Taylor nodded slowly, raising his brows as he watched her. “That’s good,” he replied, taking another sip of the hot coffee.

They sat in awkward silence as they slurped on the drinks.

Hayley felt her skin crawl as she stared out the window again, swallowing a gulp of tea that was slightly too hot. There was no reason to feel awkward around each other yet the conversation was stunted.

Hayley coughed as they placed their cups back down on the table and forced herself to look at him. She felt vulnerable under his gaze. He always seemed to know what she was thinking and feeling before she could tell him but she was too ashamed to share with him how she felt about her life right now.

“So what did you think of the wedding?” she shrugged, unsure if she really wanted his opinion.

“Yeah,” he nodded too quickly, “It was great.”

Hayley dropped her eyes back to the table and ripped off a piece of the muffin to occupy her hands as she dreaded the next part of their conversation.

“I feel like I barely saw you that night,” she laughed awkwardly, shoving the muffin into her mouth to stop her laugh turning stale.

“Yeah,” Taylor sighed, “about that.”

Hayley frowned as he held up and finger and reached down into his bulky bag to retrieve something.

“So this,” he said, placing a slightly bent, small bouquet of pink peony flowers that were already losing petals onto the table, “is my apology for leaving early.”

“T, you didn’t have to –”

“No, no,” he said, voice sounding louder but not any stronger. “I’m sorry I left early, I just had some stuff to do that I couldn’t miss.”

Hayley nodded, not pointing out that there really wasn’t much he could have been required to do that late into the evening.

“It’s fine,” she nodded, smile not quite reaching her eyes, “it was a long night for everyone, don’t worry.”

Taylor looked at her strangely for a moment, shaking his head before nodding. “Yeah, so anyway,” he continued, pushing the flowers towards her, “these are my way to say sorry and congrats I guess.”

“Taylor.” Hayley’s dropped her voice and the sudden shift came off as almost shy. She reached out to pick up the flowers, overwhelmed by the unexpected happiness that scent brought to her day.

“It’s not a big deal,” Taylor mumbled, waving his hand.

Hayley looked at him properly for the first time since he’d arrived. The need to tell him everything she’d been feeling over the past few weeks was overwhelming. His kind, encouraging eyes gave her the perfect opportunity but she knew that admitting all her problems out loud would make them real. It was easier to just roll with it and wait until they eventually resolved themselves.

“Did you enjoy the day?” Taylor asked nervously, flashing her a light smile that she knew was not truly genuine.

She smiled softly and nodded. “Yeah, it was great,” she offered quietly, unsure if either of them really wanted to hear her real answer.

Taylor nodded in response before taking a long sip of coffee.

They sat in awkward silence for the first time in years.

“Well, then I’m happy to hear that,” Taylor said, smiling as his jaw clenched, “as long as your happy,”

Hayley’s smile twinged as he spoke. She would never admit it but hearing those words come from him felt like a punch in the gut.

She shifted in her seat before flashing a smile, praying that he wouldn’t call her out for how stale it was.

“Yeah,” she said, mostly for herself, “I am.”

Taylor opened his mouth to respond then closed it. “Cool,” he said tightly, nodding as he turned to look out the window, avoiding her eye. “I’m glad.”

2017

The bus had been quiet for hours when Hayley heard the heavy door shift open.

The boys had eventually gone out for lunch after her insistence that she wanted to be alone today to take some time for herself. Her limbs and eyes had felt heavy for hours despite her body's inability for fall asleep and she scolded herself for not even being able to take advantage of the window of alone time for a much-needed nap. Just another example of failure, she thought.

She ran her hands roughly over her face as she considered whether she felt physically up to dealing with whoever had come back on board. The need to be helpful and available almost overrode her desire to bury her face in the blankets and close her eyes until whoever it was disappeared.

She kept her breaths shallow as footsteps walked up the bunks corridor, silently praying that whoever it was would assume she was asleep and leave her alone.

She grimaced as the footsteps stopped outside her bunk and waited.

“Erm, Hayley,” Taylor called softly, tapping gently on the wall next to her bunk.

Hayley considered her options before sighing. There was no way she could get away with lying to him. The rest of the guys, maybe. But not him.

“Mmhm,” she called meekly, still unwilling to pull the curtain to face him just yet.

“How you doing?” he asked gently.

Hayley couldn’t help but resent the fact that he knew she needed him to be gentle today.

“I’m okay,” she said. The words sounded unsure at best, even to her.

“Do you want to come and sit with me in the lounge?” Taylor asked soothingly.

Hayley winced at the thought of facing all the guys and the noise they carried with them. She loved each one of them but she didn’t know if that was something she could deal with right now.

“Did everyone come back with you?” she asked, feeling silly for how weak her voice sounded.

“No,” Taylor confirmed, “It’s just me.”

“Okay,” was all Hayley could muster up.

“So you do you want to talk without the curtain now?”

Hayley rolled her eyes but she knew he was right. It was ridiculous to keep talking like this.

She nodded even though he couldn’t see her and wiped her hands over her eyes one last time before reaching to push the curtain back.

Hayley avoided his concerned look as she curled out of the bunk, hoping down to the floor. She had the feeling if she looked him in the eyes right now that she wouldn’t be able to stop the tears from flowing.

Instead, she turned her back to him and walked to the lounge, pushing her shoulders back as far as she could. She snagged her favourite spot on the uncomfortable sofa, wishing she had a blanket for cover.

Finally mustering the guts to look Taylor in the eyes, she forced a flat smile on her lips as he stared at her from the doorway.

“You don’t have to do that, you know?” he said simply.

Hayley faulted at his words and frowned. “Do what?”

“That,” he said, gesturing in her direction. “You don’t have to do that thing where you pretend like it’s all okay.”

“Excuse me?” she asked, affronted at his blunt words.

“I’m not trying to get on your case,” Taylor explained, hands raised in front of his chest, “but you don’t have to act like you’re okay when it’s just me here.”

Hayley glared at him as she considered her response. Her mind came up blank as she tried to think of anything that would sound authentic.

“I know what day it is, Hayley.”

She felt her lips quiver at his words as she forced herself to maintain eye contact. Damn him for knowing what was wrong.

Hayley eventually opened her mouth to speak but shut it again when she had to swallow the lump before she could say anything to him. “I didn’t want to make a big deal of it,” she mumbled quietly, trying to keep her voice stable.

“Hayley,” Taylor said, crossing the room to where she sat, “it’s only been a month since the announcement. There’s nothing wrong with being sad about it. Public divorce is some heavy shit.”

Hayley nodded before dropping her face into her palms. “I don’t even feel sad,” she said, muffled against her palms, “I’m just so embarrassed.”

Taylor nodded before reaching out to rub her shoulder, leaving her words to sit in the air for a moment. “Well,” he eventually coughed out, “when it’s just you and me, you don’t have to be embarrassed.” He smiled softly as she looked up from her palms to face him, “You can be whatever you feel like and I’ll stay with you through it.”

Hayley smiled as her eyes blurred, a watery haze feeling her vision. She nodded softly, unable to think of anything she could say to his words that would communicate just how he makes her feel.

“Thanks, T,” she eventually murmured, reaching up to grab the hand resting on her shoulder. It was enough right now to just have him here.

They sat in companionable silence for a few minutes before Taylor jumped up.

“Oh I forgot,” he said, moving in the direction of the bunks, “I got you something.”

Hayley’s brows raised at his sudden movement but waited patiently to see what he had.

Hayley inhaled in excitement as he returned with bright yellow daffodils in a jar.

“Here you go,” he said, presenting them to her proudly.

Hayley beamed as she accepted them, lifting them to her nose. She faulted at the lack of smell and reached to touch the petals before looking up at him, confused. “They’re fake?”

“Yeah,” Taylor nodded before gesturing to the bus, “I would have got you real ones but I don’t think they will travel well so I thought this would be better instead.”

Hayley nodded at his thoughtfulness and grinned.

“They’ll last longer as well,” he pointed out, grinning softly at her pleased reaction to his gift.

“Yeah, they will,” she said softly, overwhelmed by his kindness. She would never stop being impressed at his ability to cheer up her worst moments with such simple words and actions.

“Anyway,” he said bashfully, twiddling with the collar of his shirt shyly, “I hope you like them.”

Hayley grinned at his nervousness and uncurled her legs from underneath her. She crossed the small room quickly and wordlessly gestured for a hug in thanks.

Taylor immediately pulled her in and wrapped his long arms around her as she tightened her arms around his waist, pulling him in closer. Inhaling in the comforting scent of his cologne, Hayley closed her eyes as she buried into his chest. If she could stay like this for the rest of the day, it might make the whole thing a bit easy.

Taylor rubbed his hands around her back in comforting circles as they swayed gently. “I know I’ve said it hundreds of times before Hayley,” he spoke into her hair, “but I mean it when I say we are in this together.”

Hayley focused on the soothing circles and nodded, knowing he was telling the truth. The ache and the pain of the day didn’t fade because he was here, but she couldn’t help but feel a little less alone.

2018

Hayley fussed with the loose pieces that had come loose from the bun she had tied at the base of her neck. She had been confident in her appearance less than two minutes ago but she could easily find imperfections each time she checked in the mirror.

She had to stop her eyes rolling into the back of her head as she realised she was anxiously picking herself apart before a date. Was that acceptable anymore when she was rapidly approaching her thirties?

She broke out of her mindless spiral and snorted as Alf sat beside her, copying her movements and staring at himself in the mirror. She grinned at him as he stuck his tongue out, his furry tail wagging around behind him as he basked in her attention.

“Hey bud,” she cooed, leaning down to pet him. “Do we like the outfit, is it good enough?” she asked, laughing as he surged upwards to try and lick her, placing his paws on her bent knees to get better access to her face.

“Woah,” she laughed, jerking her face back and out of reach of his tongue as she gently pushed him back down to the ground. “I’m going to take that as an enthusiastic yes, baby.”

She groaned as she stretched back up into standing position again, using the wall to help her up. She’d never felt closer to thirty.

Checking once more, she took a few steps back to scan her whole body. She liked most of the outfit, a simple dress was hard to mess up but she frowned at the shoes. She’d chosen pair of low heels to feel like she’d dressed up but now she just felt uncomfortable and overdressed for the occasion.

Kicking off the heels and pushing them to the wall with her foot, Hayley reached into her dresser for a small pair of ankle socks. Her next option was more comfortable than the first and certainly more like herself.

She tugged on the chunky trainers that sat on her shoe rack and knotted the laces, before standing back to check her appearance. She grinned at the sight of the new outfit and nodded to herself.

She stepped back from her dressing area and forced herself to move back downstairs, whistling for Alf to follow her. She didn’t tend to get nervous in life but today was different, and it wasn’t going to help if she picked apart her appearances.

“Hey Buddy,” she called, getting Alf’s attention, “Do you want some treats before I go out?”

She laughed as he scrambled at the word treats and moved to the cupboard that held his supplies. She snorted at the drool that dribbled from his chin as he waited for the chew bone which he promptly carried over to his bed, no longer interested in her.

She watched him as he chewed, endeared to his sweet face until the knock at the door broke her out of her thoughts.

Her stomach tingled and swirled as she stared at it, debating if she should wait for a few seconds so she didn’t seem so keen.

She groaned and rolled her eyes at her herself before reminding herself to get a grip. Smoothing down the dress once, she walked quickly to the door, trying to ignore the grin that was forming on her face as she pulled it open.

“Hey,” she said, grinning at the sight of an equal nervous Taylor who fiddled with the side of his beanie whilst his other remained hidden behind his back.

“Hi there,” he grinned back shyly, eyes darting quickly to scan her outfit before grinning in appreciation.

They stood in the doorway and smiled at each other until Hayley quirked her brow at his hidden hand.

“Oh yeah,” Taylor grinned sheepishly, embarrassed at being caught out. “These are for you.”

Hayley’s eyes softened at the coral coloured roses at sat in his hand, tied together with a small ribbon.

“T,” she breathed out, overwhelmed by their beauty, “Thank you.”

Taylor shrugged bashfully, but she could tell by his pleased smile that he was relieved she liked them. “It’s no big deal,” he said, waving her off.

She smiled and reached to squeeze his forearm. “They’re beautiful, T.”

“I’m glad you like them,” he said sincerely.

Hayley paused for a moment before shrugging and reached to grab the back of his neck to pull him down to her level. She placed a soft but lingering kiss on his lips as she stroked the short hairs at the back of his head. If it wasn’t for the flowers between them, she would have been tempted to pull him closer and suggest they scrap the plans they had for today.

Eventually, she pulled away, keeping their faces near and grinning again before finally releasing his neck. That wasn’t even the first time she had kissed him but her stomach still fluttered each time they passed that invisible barrier of desire they’d worked so hard on ignoring over the past few years.

Sliding her hand down his forearm, she linked their fingers to pull him into the house. “I just need to put these in water before we go,” she explained as she led them to the kitchen.

At the sight of Taylor, Alf bounded from his bed over to him, throwing himself at his knees in desperate need for his attention. Taylor laughed and bent to greet him.

“Hey bud,” he laughed as he scratched his ears.

Hayley smiled and bit her lip as she watched them play, eventually dragging her eyes away from them as she set about finding her favourite vase in the cupboard. That was one thing she appreciated about her incoming thirties. The acceptance that having a favourite vase was cool.

“Have you got the tickets?” she asked as the water started to fill the vase.

“Yep,” Taylor replied, popping the p as he tapped his front pocket. “Two tickets for the 7:30 exhibition.”

“Perfect,” Hayley smiled, genuinely excited to look at the art. They had been talking about the exhibition since it was announced whilst they were on tour, but she’d never pictured then that it would technically be the setting of their first date. She flushed at the thought and set about to focus her attention on the flower arrangement.

The flowers were a pink-orange mixture and she grinned at the bountiful bouquet. She knew the colour of each rose had meaning but her mind blanked on the meaning of coral. If Taylor wasn’t in the room with her right now she would have rushed for her phone to google it but that would ruin the mildly casual atmosphere she wanted to have during their date.

She adjusted the flowers one last time before walking to place them on the dining room stable, standing back to enjoy their bloom. The sight of the overtly romantic gift caught her breath in her throat, signifying that her secret longing was no longer unrequited or a hidden thought she kept firmly too herself.

She smiled and turned to Taylor when she sensed his presence at her side. “They are really beautiful, T,” she said, hoping he knew just how touched she was by the gift.

Taylor shrugged bashfully and waved her off. “If this is our first date, I wanted to do it right,” he said simply, “pick you up with flower and all that stuff that I’ve never really done before.”

Hayley grinned at his words and nodded again, her chest tightening pleasantly at the realisation he was only doing this for her.

Taylor smiled at her before clearing his throat and turning to the door, reaching out sideways for her hand.

“You ready to go?” he asked.

“Yeah, I am,” she said brightly as she reached and interlocked their fingers.

January 2019

Hayley hugged her knees as she watched a young boy and his mother walk past her gate, their small dog in tow.

It was a surprisingly mild day for January but that didn’t motivate her enough to finally take Alf out for his morning walk. He was a big dog who needed to burn off energy and get regular exercise, but he’d have to make do without today. Walking to the gate didn’t seem possible today, let alone taking him on the walk he actually needed.

Hayley started as Alf jumped up at the small armchair she was on, his tongue out as he seemed to stare pleadingly at her.

She sighed and sagged, reaching out to stroke behind his ears. “Sorry bud,” she said quietly, swallowing down the guilt of letting him down. “I think it’s going to have to be a garden day.”

Realistically she knew he was a dog with no real grasp on the English language or human emotion but she couldn’t help but feel like he knew she needed him to nudge forward and attempt to lick her face, balancing his thick paws on the cushion next to her feet. She smiled softly at him and leaned in to kiss the soft fur on top of his head. It was strange knowing that there was very little she could do to upset him, but Hayley considered it comforting to know that she couldn’t really push him away as well.

If she was alone forever but at least had Alf, it wouldn’t be ideal but she could live it.

The potential of that seemed to grow every day.

Hayley sighed and budged to the side of the cushion, tapping to her side to invite him on. The chair wasn’t really big enough for the both of them but the added weight on her lap would be grounding. She smiled softly as he leapt at the invitation, clearly overjoyed with the attention as he dropped onto her lap and settled quietly.

They sit quietly for at least ten minutes until Alf startled and barked at the sudden knock on the door. Hayley sighed and pushed herself up from the chair, joints clicking and wincing as Alf’s barks pierced the calm silence she’d barely settled into.

“Hey chill,” she groaned, shuffling towards the door and reaching for his collar to pull him back.

“One second,” she called out to the door as she set about unlocking the door. She grimaced at her attire, pyjamas and a robe from last night since she hadn’t bothered to get changed this morning, and tugged the belt tighter.

“Oh hi,” she greeted the delivery man, schooling her face to mask her surprise to him. She couldn’t remember ordering anything in the last few days.

“Hey,” the young man nodded quickly before scanning his clipboard. “I have a delivery here for Miss Williams?”

“Yeah, that’s me,” Hayley confirmed, brows furrowing as she skimmed the possibilities of what it was in her mind. Brian may have sent the new prototypes to her house for her check but that was typically done in a meeting at the offices and the box seemed too big to only hold hair products. She prayed it wasn’t, she didn’t have the energy to do that today.

The man nodded and handed her the clipboard. She signed the paper nevertheless. “Thanks.”

“Here you go,” the man said cheerfully, handing it to her before waving once and turning to leave.

Hayley was shocked by the lightness of the box considering its size but shrugged and moved to shut the door as she thanked the man. Maybe the surprise could lift her mood.

“What have we got here then, Alf?” she said, yawning as he followed her over to the table. She dropped the black box onto the coffee table and kneeled, running a comforting hand down his back as he sat beside her.

Her nails were too blunt to really help but she couldn’t be bothered to walk to the kitchen to get a knife. There was no logic to her choice since it took much longer to peel the tape off by hand but eventually, she loosened the edge enough to wiggle her finger under and yank the rest off. The box was longer than it was wide and she enjoyed the pleasant satisfaction of the gliding the tape off in one smooth peel.

Her breath caught in the throat as she opened the box.

The fresh scent of flowers flooded her senses as she pulled back the flaps, revealing the bouquet of soft pink Dahlias, held together by a thick piece of ribbon.

The bouquet was plentiful but Hayley couldn’t help but be gentle as she pulled them from the box. Whether it was the shock of receiving them, or the how they seemed to dull the heavy feeling of sadness that had followed her for weeks, she couldn’t help but hold them like they were the most precious gift she’d ever received.

Hayley buried her nose into the petals, inhaling deeply as she closed her eyes. Her younger self would be shocked to know just how much comfort flowers brought her.

“You want to see?” she said, tipping the flowers to Alf. He tipped his head to see the flowers before losing interest and getting up to trot back to the armchair, dropping down in a huff and tucking himself in to sleep.

Hayley chuckled at his disinterest and smiled softly at her sleeping dog before pulling the box back to the edge of the table to look for a card from the sender. Flower deliveries were common from brands she had mentioned or artists thanking her for support, but she always liked to be able to send thanks back to be polite.

The small white envelope was a stark contrast to the black box. Hayley appreciated the calligraphy that printed her name on the front of the envelope before flipping it to peel open the flap. The box and the font suggested the bouquet was expensive so she was genuinely curious to know who would have spent money like that on her.

She shimmied the thick white card out of the envelope, slightly ripping one of the seams as she hurried to pull it out.

Hayley’s chin trembled without warning as she saw who the sender was, her fingers rising to rest on her lips so she could focus as she read.

_Just wanted you to know that I’m still thinking of you_

_We are going to work this out, H._

_Miss you,_

_T x_

Her eyes closed as she processed the words, releasing a long, cool breathe out her mouth to calm herself before she was brave enough to look at it again. She gulped and wiped the wetness that had welled up as she read.

They had barely spoken since Hayley had broken off whatever it was they had been doing up until last month. She couldn’t help but always be concerned for him when she wasn’t with him but all she had heard recently from Zac was that he had hadn’t taken her decision well.

This was the first sign in a month that he didn’t resent her for what she’d done.

The knowledge of that rose in her throat as she choked back a sob that threatened to escape. This was the first time she’d really allowed herself to feel something about what had happened between them but she didn’t want to ruin this moment with sadness.

The flowers represented hope and that’s all she wanted to feel right now.

Alf had leapt up from his seat at Hayley’s strangled noise and rushed to check her surroundings, before pushing himself into her space to comfort her. She laughed wetly and rubbed his head, shushing his concerning.

“It’s okay baby,” she laughed again, feeling a rush of giddiness despite the wetness of her eyes, “these are happy tears, I promise.”

He nuzzled into her palm pressed against his face in response and Hayley welcomed him to shuffle closer as she clutched the card to her chest with the other hand. The sudden rush of emotion after weeks of bleakness was overwhelming but her dog and the flowers grounded her.

She bit her lip as she glimpsed the flowers again, her heart thudding as she realised what they meant.

It meant he was going to fight for her.

\---

April 2020

“There she is!” Taylor called, pointing the sticky spatula in her direction as she walked in.

“Here I am,” Hayley laughed, shrugging as she grinned.

“So how does it feel?” he asked, pulling open a cupboard to grab a plate.

“How does what feel?” she asked coyly, resting her hips on the kitchen cupboard beside him.

Taylor laughed and glared sarcastically. “Oh I don’t know,” he said, wrapping his arm around her waist, “I heard something about an album release.”

“Oh you did?” she grinned.

“Yeah, I did. Weird, huh?” he said, rubbing his brown in mock confusion. “Guess I was wrong,” he shrugged as he slid the plate away from her, “I’ll just eat this then instead.”

“No, no, no,” Hayley laughed, swiping the plate and taking it to the table, “whatever this is, it’s still mine.”

Taylor laughed loudly at her antics and followed her to the table. “It’s supposed to be vegan French toast if that’s even possible,” he shrugged, confused by the concept himself. “I found the recipe online, who knows if it’s actually good,” he said as he sat beside her.

Hayley cut off a piece before chewing thoughtful and nodding vigorously. “It’s good,” she confirmed, leaning over for a syrupy kiss. “Thanks, T.”

“Hey,” he shrugged, motioning towards her, “today is your day. It’s not every day that you realise your first album.”

“Solo album,” she reminded him.

“Still,” he shrugged again, reaching for her hand that wasn’t holding a fork, “It’s a big deal.”

Hayley smiled softly at him before frowning and waving the fork in his direction. “Hey,” she said, swallowing down a slightly too large piece of bread, “it’s a big day for you too, mister.”

“A production credit isn’t the same as a first whole solo album,” he reasoned, shaking his head.

“It is!” she cried, indignant on his behalf.

“It’s not,” he laughed, squeezing her hand, “It’s no big deal.”

“Well it is to me!” she stressed, squeezing his hand in response. “Here,” she said, pointing in the direction of the kitchen and moving to stand, “let me make you something.”

“No, no,” he said, pulling her back to the chair, “Just let me make this about you please.”

Hayley cocked her head at his and glared for a moment, before reluctantly nodding in agreement. “Fine,” she mumbled, “but it is a big deal, and I don’t care what you say.”

Taylor nodded before reaching for the fork. “Okay, fine,” he relented, “we can agree to share this then.”

“Compromise,” Hayley grinned, nodding in pride.

Taylor hummed in agreement as he chewed before flashing a thumbs up and shrugging. “Damn,” he nodded, as he swallowed. “I did a pretty good job here,” he said, using the fork to gesture at the food.

“You did,” she agreed, smiling as he took another bite. Shuffling the chair closer to his, she ran a hand through his soft curls, longer than they had been in a while and free of product.

Taylor glanced at her before smiling subtly and gestured for her to take the fork again. “Hey you’ve got a lot of stuff to do today, you need this more than me.”

Hayley nodded, raising her brows as she considered what her schedule was today. It was pretty promo heavy until Joey was scheduled to arrive later that afternoon, and then they were going to celebrate the released as pandemic friendly as they could.

It was nothing compared to what Paramore promotion used to be, but still draining nonetheless.

They sat in comfortable silence as Hayley finished the rest of the plate.

“This was really good, T,” she said, wiping her mouth with the back of her hand.

“I’m glad,” Taylor said, pulling the empty plate from her before she could grab it, “I can’t promise everything I’ll ever make will be good, but I’ll make that for you again if you want.”

“I do want,” she laughed, as she leaned around him to reach for the plate, “hey, let me at least clean if you cooked!”

“Nope, sorry,” Taylor said, shaking his head as he held the plate high above his head and laughed. “You’ve got stuff to do today, so go get ready,” he said, lightly smacking down her grabby hands.

Hayley stopped and glared at him with raised brows.

Taylor rolled his eyes and dropped the plate into the sink, leaning forward to grab Hayley’s shoulders to spin her round in the direction of her stairs. “Go on,” he urged, rubbing down her arms, “I’ve got this.”

Hayley sighed but nodded. “Okay,” she agreed, “but I don’t feel good about this,” gesturing to the pile of mess by the sink.

“If it makes you feel better, I’ll let you wait on me hand and foot tomorrow,” he offered, trailing his hands to rest on her waist, enjoying the soft silk of her robe.

Hayley snorted and rolled her eyes as she could practically hear the grin in his voice. “Yeah sure thing, big guy,” she laughed, before twisting round to grab his neck. “Thanks for this,” she murmured against his mouth before kissing him quickly, “love you.”

“Love you too,” he said, squeezing her waist once before gently pushing her forward. “Now let’s get going.”

She nodded and headed towards the stairs to go get ready for the day.

-

After hanging up the facetime with Brian to confirm how she looked for the day, Hayley ran her hands through her hair one more time, before smiling and nodding into the mirror.

Strolling back through to her bedroom as she scrolled through her mentions, she smiled at sweet fan reactions and liked a few as she sat on her bed. Alf, who had given up waiting for her as she did her makeup, came bounding up the stairs to her room and leapt onto her bed to barge into her side.

“Hi bud,” she laughed, scratching him behind the ear. “What’s got you going?”

“Hey,” Taylor said unexpectedly from the door frame.

Hayley jerked her head at the sound smiled.

“Hey?” she replied, confused why he was hiding halfway through the door.

“I’ve got something for you,” Taylor said, grinning smugly.

“Do you now?” Hayley grinned, loving when he brought her presents.

Taylor was good at gift-giving, although he never gave himself credit for it. He’d given her big gifts like equipment and small ones like books and they always meant just as much.

“I’m really proud of you for doing all this,” he began.

“I’m proud of you too,” Hayley butted in.

“Okay but just let me get through this though,” he said, raising his brows in amusement.

Hayley nodded, zipping across her mouth in confirmation.

“Thanks,” he nodded and grinned. “I’m really proud of you for doing all this, but obviously with everything going on in the world, this day isn’t exactly what you planned for.”

Taylor cut off and glared pointedly as Hayley opened her mouth to interrupt, reminding her of the promise she made seconds ago. “As I was saying, this day isn’t what we could have ever imagined it would be when we were in the studio last year, but this doesn’t mean it's not special, or a big deal.”

Hayley nodded, smiling at him softly.

“I promise we will celebrate and do everything this album deserves when we finally can, but for now I got you these,” he said, shifting from his place against the door frame.

Hayley’s eyes widened as she took in the bouquet that Taylor held in front of him. The flowers were a mix of different types and colours, wild and cultivated, already placed in a glass vase.

“Taylor,” Hayley began, taking in a deep breathe.

“And I know it’s kind of cheesy,” Taylor injected, “the name of the album and all –”

“No,” Hayley interrupted, shaking her head vigorously. “They are beautiful.”

She dropped her phone on the bed and moved to take them from him. The mix of the pinks and greens was exquisite, clearly done professionally even though she wasn’t sure how he managed to get them during a pandemic.

“They really are perfect, Taylor,” she said quietly, smiling up at him.

“I’m glad,” he nodded, “you deserve them.”

Hayley looked up at him through her lashes for a moment before moving to place them on the bedside table.

“Thank you, T,” she said, moving back to wrap her arms around his shoulders, scratching the soft hairs at the back of his head with her nails.

“It’s no problem,” he grinned, pulling her closer by the waist. “Anything you want today, let me know.”

“Hey,” she said, tapping on his shoulders. “You did just as much work on this as me.”

Taylor began to shake his head until Hayley cut him off. “Hey, take some credit, this was a team effort.”

Taylor watched her was a moment, a look in his eyes that Hayley couldn’t quite put her finger on. “Fine,” he conceded, smiling softly, “I guess we did it together then.

“Yeah we did,” Hayley confirmed, pulling him in closer, “together.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There we go! Thanks for reading this one! Please let me know what you thought of the style, do you guys want more plot driven ones or stuff like this? I enjoy writing either so I'll happily write whatever you guys like!
> 
> Hope you enjoyed it! x

**Author's Note:**

> There we go! I'm going to upload one more chapter on this story, focusing on the more recent years so look out for that if you enjoyed it this!
> 
> Please let me know what you thought of this piece, it's less plot driven than what I've done before so I'm still trying to figure out how to do it best.
> 
> Thanks for reading!


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